I was in my early teenage stage, the one thing I still regretted is I had so much fear in talking to people. I am telling this as it starts like a Bollywood story and really worked for me as one new admission in our school and luckily she is girl, this was not the story, the story started because of this. if we get something extra than our luck it leads to some devastation.
She was new and she started talking to me first, and if someone breaks my old habits of not talking 2 things happen, either love or a best friend, But when she gets to know I am a nincompoop, she reduces talking to me but I was able to talk to her as she had made the space to talk. This later went to a limit where she did not even think of replying.
I was a person who did share anything to anyone even my parents about anything and I did not have any friends nor I have now. This led to extra sleeping, not interested to go to school, did not do any homework. I was like what is happening to me , but it was era of computer and internet as I could not share anything with anyone so the computer became my friend and even today it is.
Now I found it was depression, but I was a teenager so just ignored it. Life became so boring that i had thoughts of running away from home and from this society. The level of negative thought increased as my parents used to scold for bad marks and rude behavior. This negative thought used to be hanging myself or jumping from my building from the terrace.
Miracle as a Bollywood story as I had loved sports like any other boys. So I used to play cricket with 3 people losers like me. but one day other classmates from our class who used to play football came to play cricket as the football ground was under some renovation. So I was eager to join everyone and talk to them but could not but that day it turned tables for me. I was a very good tennis ball cricket player as I had used to join people in the ground near my house.
That day while playing I kept shouting at everyone as I was a very good player in cricket not in school but in the ground near my house. People used to drop catches, play dot balls, and getting hit 20 runs each over. I lost me all my patience and shouted and scolded badly everyone in my team. Next match I fought to be the captain of my team. And won the toss and batted and alone score was 35 with 3 sixes in a 6 over match. and bowled with 2 wickets. After that match, we had to leave to house and I was happy with my performance. And did not have any bad thoughts, just was tired had my lunch di little bit of homework and after dinner slept by 8.30.
The next day my mom asks me how come so early you slept, I just replied that I was too tired as we had PT period the previous day. And we Indian moms she wants to know everything I just tried to hide my feelings of satisfaction and dodged from there as my van had come. That day everyone started talking to me as if I was best which I was but they didn’t know. and there were players in another team who played far better than me, I was shocked by there reaction, now I can’t handle more 3 people but managed and tried to ignore them, but they gave me recognition and also offered me to play football with them. And succeed in that as well as a goalkeeper.
Moral: Sometime we underestimate ourselves so assume you can do with full confidence the thing will turn table towards you.
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